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26 February 2012 @ 02:49 pm
hold me tight (and never let me go); mark/eduardo, pg  

a/n: this is for this prompt at the kinkmeme. :)
rating: pg.
length: 1,454 words.
summary: five times they cuddled without acknowledging it, and the one time mark finally asked.


i.

The first time, Mark could write it off as nothing.

He’s sitting on the couch, and maybe he and Wardo have had a bit more to drink than they should have, and Mark laughs, tilting his head back, and Wardo snuggles up to him, rests his head on his shoulder.

Mark looks at him, bemused, but he doesn’t say anything, feeling his heart race in a way that may not be healthy but feels… nice, in a way that doesn’t usually happen, nowadays.

He tangles his fingers in Wardo’s hair, because he can, because he’s halfway to drunk on cheap beer and he hasn’t slept in god knows how long, and he hears a small noise against his shoulder, and Wardo presses a bit against him, hand moving to rest on Mark’s thigh.

If this were somewhere else, and Wardo were – say, a girl, a pretty girl (but not too pretty, because girls have standards and Mark doesn’t fall into those standards), Mark might kiss her, tilt her chin up with the tips of his fingers and give her a soft kiss.

As it stands, though, Wardo isn’t, and Mark’s not brave enough, anyway.

Chris and Dustin go to bed and Mark should, too – he should nudge Wardo, move out from underneath him – but the couch is comfortable enough, and he elects to stay where he is, managing to reach over and drape a blanket over both of them, shifting a minute amount so he’s more comfortable.

He presses his face against the top of Wardo’s hair, almost a kiss but not quite, and he shifts himself closer, bringing up an arm to wrap around his shoulders.

It doesn’t take him long to drift off, lulled to sleep by Wardo’s deep, even breathing.

ii.

“Mark, you need to sleep,” Wardo says.

Mark rolls his eyes, staring at the screen, his fingers tapping out an even, neat rhythm. “I’m not tired,” he says, but even the short sentence comes out slurred (and, fuck, he didn’t know his voice could do that).

“When was the last time you slept?” Wardo asks.

Mark closes his eyes for the briefest of moments and when he opens them, Wardo’s tucking him into bed.

Mark shakes his head. “How’d you get me here so fast?” he asks, but it’s more of a mumble.

Wardo smiles at him, pushing a piece of hair off of his face. “You need to sleep.”

Mark shakes his head, sitting up. “I’m almost done, really, just give me a few more minutes.”

“In the morning,” Wardo says, commanding, and pushes him back down.

Mark shakes his head. “Wardo. Eduardo. You realize you aren’t my mother.”

He rolls his eyes, and before Mark has time to react (though, admittedly, his reaction time has been greatly reduced thanks to this whole “no sleep” thing) he’s in bed next to Mark, holding him down with an arm across his stomach.

“I will hold you here if I have to. I’m not your mother but I’m not going to let you kill yourself through sleep deprivation, Mark.”

He won’t argue with that, and he plops his head down on the pillow, closing his eyes again.

“Good, querido,” Eduardo breathes out and Mark feels his breath hitch, but he pushes himself further against him, shutting his eyes tight, pretends to already be asleep.

It doesn’t take long before he does fall asleep, his face resting on Wardo’s arm, and if there’s a problem in the morning, he’ll deal with it, then.

/

In the morning, Wardo smiles at him and gives him a soft kiss on the forehead and it feels like more than it is; and so Mark is brusque, pretends he isn’t grateful.

Wardo catches his eye, though, and tilts his head just so, and Mark knows that he gets it.

He doesn’t know what there is to get; he’s not one to deal with feelings too often and so he pushes them down, down, because that’s not something he wants to deal with.

iii.

The night Wardo comes to Palo Alto, Mark curls up next to him on the bed without saying a word.

After a moment, he feels a hand on his back, and he shifts so he’s leaning against him, head pillowed on his chest.

I’m sorry, he’s saying in the only way that he can, and Wardo’s nails lightly massaging his back are all the answer that he needs.

His eyes slip shut – he really is tired but he should stay awake.

“Go ahead,” Wardo whispers, and he sounds half-dead himself – because he’s been on a plane for hours, because Mark forgot, because –

“Really,” and he sounds amused, now. He’s always been able to read Mark like a book. “Go to sleep.”

“Stay,” Mark pretends he doesn’t whisper, and he feels the hand on his back still for only a moment before continuing, forcedly similar to the way it was before.

Mark smiles and lets himself fall asleep.

iv.

After everything, Mark doesn’t like to sleep alone.

It takes him a long, long time to fall asleep these days; he has to wrap himself in blankets and push pillows together and curl himself around them, because, pathetically, to be alone in his bed is – it feels lonely, in a way that he isn’t, usually.

When Wardo comes back – he comes back, and Mark’s never been more grateful and in awe of anything before – they have a night together, like Harvard, with beer and pizza and video games and they’re twenty-four but that’s okay, that’s okay because they’re still young, so young, even if Mark is the fucking inventor of Facebook and they’ve had enough drama to last them lifetimes.

Chris and Dustin are there, too, eventually, and after a while, around midnight, Mark leans his head against Eduardo's shoulder without really intending to.

He feels him stiffen, and just as he’s about to sit up and apologize without really meaning it he puts an arm around him, comforting, there.

It’s so much like Harvard that it makes Mark want to cry – and so he closes his eyes, instead, breathing through his nose hard.

He stays there until he falls asleep, and he only wakes up to Wardo leading him to his bedroom, pressing him down against the sheets, pulling a blanket over him – and he hears the soft “Good night, Mark,” without registering that it means Wardo’s leaving.

He falls asleep just after that, and though the bed is empty aside from him he doesn’t feel as alone.

v.

Facebook is crashing.

Facebook is going to crash and Mark is, to put it bluntly, flipping his shit.

This cannot be happening this cannot happen he thinks, and clicks faster than he ever has before, works through the problems as quickly as he can because he’s not letting this fucking bug take Facebook down.

And when he’s through he feels a hand on his shoulder, and he hasn’t really slept in three days and he’s woozy on his feet.

Wardo’s there, he can tell that’s who it is, but Mark doesn’t say anything, just leans against him, heavy.

“Mark,” he hears, whisper-soft, and then feels himself being seated on the couch.

He shakes his head when Wardo tries to leave, grabs at his arm and pulls him, because even though he hasn’t’ slept in forever he knows he won’t be able to sleep alone.

“Stay,” he whispers, mumbles, and manages to get his eyes open enough to look at him.

Wardo seems to deliberate before nodding, sinking down next to him, and Mark curls up, close, and he can feel his breath tickling his hair and it’s wonderfully, sickeningly perfect.

He sleeps better that night than he ever has.

(i.

Wardo kisses him, one evening.

He’s picking Mark up and he puts a hand on his shoulder, pulls him in, kisses him, soft lips and tongue and the barest amount of teeth.

When he pulls back he’s smiling, looking almost shy.

Mark bites his lip and grins back, helpless with it.

That night, Mark pulls Wardo to bed, entirely in his right mind.

“Stay with me,” he says, forming the words, crisp and sure. “Please.”

Wardo smiles and they crawl into bed together, and Mark reaches for him, pulls him close.

“Be here when I wake up,” he whispers, and he’s presses himself against Wardo, as much as he can. “Please don’t leave me.”

“I wouldn’t,” and it sounds like a dream, too good to be true, but Wardo’s hand is real and sure on his side, fingers pressing against his hip. “Mark, I won’t.”

“Good,” and he falls asleep like that, Wardo’s soft breaths tickling his hair.

He doesn’t wake up alone.)


 
 
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
Current Music: we are young - fun.
 
 
YW: (TSN) Mark and Eduardoyellowwolf5 on February 26th, 2012 07:59 pm (UTC)
Aww, so cute. ♥

("and after a while, around midnight, Mark leans his head against Mark’s shoulder without really intending to." Think that second Mark should be Eduardo)
rumpledlinenrumpledlinen on February 26th, 2012 08:17 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! And it's been fixed, thanks for pointing it out. :)
nowadventuringnowadventuring on February 26th, 2012 08:34 pm (UTC)
This was adorable and really, really sweet. I especially like the second instance.

FYI: At one point, I think you accidentally have worsk instead of works.
rumpledlinenrumpledlinen on February 26th, 2012 08:42 pm (UTC)
wow jasmine good job with the spellcheck /is very very tired and should not post things when she is

and thank you! <3 <3 i'm so glad you liked it. :)
Because it was you, because it was me...speak_me_fair on February 26th, 2012 10:53 pm (UTC)
This is just so, so very lovely. I love all the little comparisons, the way things come around but get made right, and I love this view of Eduardo as an almost invisible constant right up until the end when HE makes his presence felt and re-enforces it.

Like I said :-) lovely.
rumpledlinenrumpledlinen on February 27th, 2012 01:08 am (UTC)
<3 thank you so very, very much. i'm so glad you liked it - and yeah, that's one of the bits of their relationship that i really like. :)
(Deleted comment)
rumpledlinen: pic#115573165rumpledlinen on February 27th, 2012 01:07 am (UTC)
aww, thank you so much! :D
PADFOOT!katie_padfoot on February 26th, 2012 11:36 pm (UTC)
ugh, so adorable. you've killed me <3
rumpledlinenrumpledlinen on February 27th, 2012 01:07 am (UTC)
i'm sorry to have killed you, but so glad you liked it! :) <3
A.ohnvm on February 27th, 2012 03:34 am (UTC)
SO GOOOOOOOOD
rumpledlinenrumpledlinen on February 27th, 2012 03:40 am (UTC)
AHH THANK YOUUUUUU
(Deleted comment)
rumpledlinenrumpledlinen on February 27th, 2012 12:10 pm (UTC)
:D

Thank you so much! Wardo is in this as much as Mark is and he's having an inner OMGOMGMARK moment as well, I've decided. (Wardo is a fourteen-year-old in my mind, or something.) Ahhhh thank you! I'm so glad you liked it. :D
leopardchic79 on February 27th, 2012 04:02 pm (UTC)
This is so sweet! *happy sigh* :)
rumpledlinen: pic#115573128rumpledlinen on February 27th, 2012 09:29 pm (UTC)
:D Thank you so much!
doodlelover: *U*doodlelover on February 27th, 2012 09:23 pm (UTC)
OP :DD
Oh my GOSH, I don't even know where to start, but this entire thing is so very wonderful! It's everything I wanted, complete with little surprises that made me grin into my pillow. I love that this plays out similar to a long fic, and even feels like it. Mark not being able to sleep alone made my heart ache. <3

Thank you very much! :DD This is wonderful!
rumpledlinenrumpledlinen on February 27th, 2012 09:29 pm (UTC)
Re: OP :DD
OH MY GOODNESS this comment made me smile so hard. Thank you so much! :D I'm so glad you liked it!
Just_Jane_Doejust_jane_doe on February 29th, 2012 02:14 am (UTC)
really sweet stuff here... I like Mark's voice in this alot.